Back to Work

~Proud Parents with Nicholas, 2 Days Old~


*heavy sigh* I'm sitting here in amazement. How time really flies by. A little over a year ago I found out I was pregnant. Although a very much wanted/planned pregnancy, a shock that it actually happened. That we were finally going to become parents. After a wonderful pregnancy, unbearable back labor and an emergency c-section, our little boy arrived two weeks early. So, here in amazement, I cannot believe it's been a little over FIVE months from when he arrived and from the time I started my maternity leave. FIVE freakin' months I've been off of work and the day has now arrived that I must return to work.

The great news is that I have been approved for and will be working three-fifths time which is 24 hours or 3 days a week. This I will be doing until the end of October which will mark a year since the arrival of our little one.

I do not envy any mother who has to return to work at six or eight weeks. At six or eight weeks I was BARELY able to function and just BARELY getting a handle on this thing called motherhood. We were just finally getting the hang of breastfeeding and I was just starting to feel ok about taking him out in public.

So, even at five months - I find it hard emotionally to have to change my focus and return to work. Change my focus to something so trivial and less important than my son. If I were less selfish, I probably wouldn't return to work at all, but let's face it... I'm as independent as they come and the thought of not having my own time, my own space and my own money really makes my skin crawl.

We have been so lucky though to find someone who will be here to care for our son, someone who I feel will care and nurture him as I would. So although it's heart-breaking to have to return to work, off I go. I'm finally at peace with it and I hope it will all be worth it in the end.

~Nicholas, 5 months old (eating solids!)~